[MrPrena]

1. Calculus on graduating year. Lucky you.
This guy took an exam for you. I would not do that to my best friend, nor even my family member.

2. I would not lend him my vehicle, but it is already done.
I would just take the loss, and be a even-Steven for exam he took.

3. I would never contact that fool again. Maybe he purposely calculated that you have a M5 pictured on FB or any other social media, and approached you. Who knows.

[gatorfast]

OP sounds like a really nice guy and sometimes people just take advantage of that.

On another note, sounds like a very classy honeymoon involving cheap candy bars and fast food.

[m3ray]

Originally Posted by SKBMW

[tuphdc]

he's not your friend. you and your car are clearly not a priority.

[DSB335d]

What a shit bag of a friend. Hope you don't find any used condoms in the back seat...
Second thought I would run a black light over the interior of the car...

I would never contact that person again. He's already been dodging calls. Chalk it up to a bad life experience and move on.

The fact that you were kind and generous enough to do such a thing, and this person showed no respect to you or your property says a lot about his lack of character.

[Nkc]

Take it as a life lesson and move on. He saved your ass once and you owe him. Consider that a pay back and maybe downgrade this person on the friendship level. Did he fuck up your ride? Maybe, but in less than a week, you can have it back like the condition you gave it to him in. At least he didn't get into an accident, kill/injure someone and put the blame on you.

My closer friends and I switch cars from time to time. Its kind of expected that we'll test the limits or else what's the point. We won't go as far as smoking and getting it real dirty but premium gas is a minimal. Cars are cars and they should be driven a certain way. Its not like you are lending you wife or gf over for your buddies to gang bang for the weekend.

At the end of the day, its just a car...and a lease. If you're rattled about little things like this, you must be living a pretty smooth life to be able to lease a new M5. Chalk it up and pay the bill, I'm sure you can afford it. Just don't invest in this friend anymore.

Talk about FWP.

[tinman831]

Originally Posted by Nkc

Take it as a life lesson and move on. He saved your ass once and you owe him. Consider that a pay back and maybe downgrade this person on the friendship level. Did he fuck up your ride? Maybe, but in less than a week, you can have it back like the condition you gave it to him in. At least he didn't get into an accident, kill/injure someone and put the blame on you.

And then two weeks later, OP gets a call from the FBI...

[Maestro]

First, I know you thought it was cool he took your test for you, however, right then and there you should have know what kind of person he was. It was not about watching your back but more about pay back later which is exactly what you got.

Next, and this is something my brother-in-law say when he screws someone over like your friend did to you. He will say right to the person face, "Face it you fuck up, you trusted me."

In other words, it is your fault for trusting the guy, and he just does not have the guts to tell it to your face.

BTW, I watch my bother-in-law say that to a guy after my brother-in-law and his brother swamped the guys boat, lost his fishing gear and got water in the outboard motor, after the guy loaned his the boat for the day.

[Billup]

I'm sorry, but if there is one thing I have learned in this world, don't trust ANYONE with ANYTHING of yours, no matter how close you may have been.

My so called best friend since I was a youngster fucked me over before I left Michigan. It wasn't a huge amount of money, but it was decent enough. Ended up ghosting out, I tried to reach out to him a few times, and then by the end told him he is better off being a piece of shit on his own, I've reached out and done nothing but good for him, to get screwed over.


I hope you learn this as a lesson for the future. If it's something you value enough, you might want to consider the extreme of if you can live your life without it, or it being destroyed with no chance of getting it fixed outside of your own pockets.

[kevinbahnz]

Originally Posted by Maestro

First, I know you thought it was cool he took your test for you, however, right then and there you should have know what kind of person he was. It was not about watching your back but more about pay back later which is exactly what you got.

Next, and this is something my brother-in-law say when he screws someone over like your friend did to you. He will say right to the person face, "Face it you fuck up, you trusted me."

In other words, it is your fault for trusting the guy, and he just does not have the guts to tell it to your face.

BTW, I watch my bother-in-law say that to a guy after my brother-in-law and his brother swamped the guys boat, lost his fishing gear and got water in the outboard motor, after the guy loaned his the boat for the day.

A general contractor said something similar to me. He's gonna pay. Not today, not tomorrow , but one day.

[e90inAZ]

Originally Posted by NemesisX

Just out of curiosity, what do you do for a living? Does it involve calculus in any way? (I hope not ). Not gonna lie, I get a little uneasy when hearing about academic dishonesty but I'll leave that for another thread.

Anyways, I read through all of that and you've pretty much described my nightmare scenario. This is why I would never lend a car to a friend, and if I absolutely had to lend my car to a friend I'd only do it to someone with a comparably nice car (or better).

You mentioned your M5 is a lease. Is there a mileage limit per year? The fact that he's dodging your calls is extremely shady. If this were me, I'd be furious, kind of. The fact that your M5 is really just a rental (lease) makes things easier to swallow, but not by much.

What's your quote on the damages?

Like, if you had given me your M5 for the weekend, I would not smoke in it. I would not eat in it, nor would I order food in it and potentially grease up the carpets. I wouldn't travel on dirt roads. I'd probably buy a new pair of shoes to minimize soiling your driver side carpet I'd go as far as to abstain from coughing or sneezing or farting inside your car, and I'd be cognizant about how dirty my hands are at all times (e.g. if I go out to eat at a restaurant, I'm damn well going to make sure that I wash my hands thoroughly with soap and water before heading out to the car). Naturally, I'd only enter your car after I've showered, and I'd never take your car on a trip if I expected to get sweaty or dirty in any way. I'd meticulously make sure not to touch the windows or any glass with my bare hands. When closing a car door, I only touch the black "strip" that houses the car windows, and I'll only use a single finger or two so as to minimize how much I'm touching the vehicle. Like, I'm anal-retentive when it comes to taking care of nice cars that other people let me use. I sure as hell wouldn't put 2000 miles on it without explicitly asking your permission first, especially knowing that it's a lease. Hell, I wouldn't even ask to put 2000 miles on it within the span of 3 days in the first place . These are unwritten rules that only car guys understand.

Yeah to answer your question I'd be absolutely livid. Definitely keep us updated.

Edit: Added more anal-retentive things. And just so we're clear, none of that is said mockingly. I'm dead serious about those hypothetical, anal-retentive habits . Some of it is so ridiculous that it may be misconstrued as mocking or parody.

^^THIS

I don't even know you, and that is how I would treat your M5. This is EXTREMELY disrespectful what he did and how he treated your personal property.

If he is ducking you, just take it as a learning experience and move on. He wasn't a true friend to you in the end.

[John 070]

Originally Posted by Nkc

Take it as a life lesson and move on. He saved your ass once and you owe him. Consider that a pay back and maybe downgrade this person on the friendship level. Did he fuck up your ride? Maybe, but in less than a week, you can have it back like the condition you gave it to him in. At least he didn't get into an accident, kill/injure someone and put the blame on you.

My closer friends and I switch cars from time to time. Its kind of expected that we'll test the limits or else what's the point. We won't go as far as smoking and getting it real dirty but premium gas is a minimal. Cars are cars and they should be driven a certain way. Its not like you are lending you wife or gf over for your buddies to gang bang for the weekend.

At the end of the day, its just a car...and a lease. If you're rattled about little things like this, you must be living a pretty smooth life to be able to lease a new M5. Chalk it up and pay the bill, I'm sure you can afford it. Just don't invest in this friend anymore.

Talk about FWP.

Exactly, op and probably the groom both know the car is a lease to begin with. Even bmwfs doesn't care as long as they get it back according to the terms.

[John 070]

This reminded me of when I had a Porsche. I swapped with my friend who had a Saab for a week. A bit unequal of a swap, but my friend treated my car as if it were his own, as did I. But both vehicles were financed not leased.

[808@702]

Originally Posted by wisesoul

Hey folks. I've been dealing with a major annoyance that started last weekend. I've dwelled over it for about a week and still can't decide how I should feel about this situation. I've talked to co-workers, other friends, my gf etc. and have gotten a mixed bag of advice. This post might be a bit long winded, but I think contextualizing everything will help in putting you in my shoes.

I've known my friend Kian since freshman year orientation of university wayy back in the 2000s. He seemed like a really cool kid that was fun to be around. In a weird twist of fate, we ended up next door neighbors in our dorm halls and became best bros instantly. We carried this enthusiasm throughout our college life. We both were car fanatics, we both played lacrosse in high school, and we both loved booze and weed like any other teenager. Kian and I have done some ridiculously reckless sh*t (that I can only look back and laugh at) but we managed to survive college despite our delinquencies. By the end of college, we were pretty much inseparable; we 200% had each other's back in any situation. Funny story: Kian actually took my calculus final for me after I passed out drunk the night before. I woke up hungover and completely flustered. I had the biggest knot in my stomach because the final was 40% of my grade. Knowing all hope was lost, I hadn't even bothered to email my professor for a 2nd chance.

A few days later, I run into my calculus professor at the bakery 3 minutes from campus. He approaches me and I just think "f*ck, fu*k, I'm f***ed.." He reaches out his hand and congratulates me on the highest grade on the final. His once austere face showed a hint of a smile. My now clammy, trembling hands shake his and I mumble "th-thh-thanks? Wait what?" Kian never spoke a word of this, and little did he know he saved my a** GPA wise. We sat next to each other at our commencement in utter awe of the fact that we succeeded. Although we both had a rough first few years academically, we struggled like brothers. Somehow we both managed to get internships lined up, and suddenly newfound responsibilities awaited us. He asked me in jest to be his best man when the time came. Of course I said "hell yeah buddy!" We partied one last time together that night and had a blast. Summer came, and we promised to keep in touch. Nothing went as planned, and we became strangers just about as quickly as we became friends.

Fast forward to a month ago, I receive a post card from a familiar address. It was Kian's same sloppy a** handwriting on the front, but a very pleasant surprise written on the back. In the decade or so I have not spoken to him, he met a lovely woman at his job, are expecting a baby girl, and already have wedding plans in place! Apparently the bride's younger brother backed out as best man last minute, and Kian strongly insisted to his wife (whom I've never seen, met, or spoken to) that he would call off the wedding unless I was his best man. I called him and gave him a resounding yes, shared a few good laughs and tried to catch up with time. I was honestly flattered that after all these years, he still considered me one of his best friends. I soon receive a formal wedding invitation in the mail, and I meet him the next day for his bachelor's party at his dad's rented beach house in Malibu. We had a couple of beers/hot dogs, and we eventually stepped outside for a cigarette. I could see the excitement in his childish grin. He wouldn't stop talking about his wonderful fiancé, his new job and his outlook on life. In other words, he got his sh*t together and is now an accomplished man. We chat it up about cars and he's been through his fair share: 2008 Cayman, MK3 Supra Turbo and currently drives MK1 TT 3.2 DSG and Volvo C30 T5 manual. We walk around to the front driveway and I show him around my M5. He was in utter shock-- literally glued to the car. He's always wanted an E39 M5 back in the day, and he told me the F10 M5 is one of his dream cars for him and his wife. Naturally, I toss him the keys and off we go for a spin around PCH. We came back to the house after a 20 min drive, laughing our butts off with a perma-smile on his face. It was priceless. He jokingly mused that he was thinking of renting an M5 at Hertz for him and his wife's honeymoon to Santa Barbara in 2 weeks. I told him Hertz was overpriced, and they should just grab a mustang convertible to enjoy the open top experience on a scenic route. He agreed. We both stepped inside and while he mingled with all his other guests, I sat off to the side contemplating what he just casually said. I haven't seen him in 10 years, but I felt that I trusted him with my M5. He's had a decent collection of sporty cars, so he definitely was responsible. And shoot, it's the least I could do as his best man. After all he's done for me, what's a slight favor on my behalf? I pull him out of one of his conversations and offer my car for his weekend getaway with his wife in 2 weeks. I told him I was gonna detail my car it and lend it to him with a full tank of gas for the trip as my wedding present. Initially, he was hesitant, his wife would not be comfortable, blah blahh... I told him it would be a privilege for me to help them enjoy their little escape from reality. After much obliging, he agreed, and vouched to watch the car more than he watched pornography. Here was the arrangement:
-The trip was to take 2 days, return the car on the 3rd,
- it is ~80 miles one way, he said he probably wouldn't be able to use the full tank
-He was going to lend me his Volvo for those 3 days

So the time came and I dropped off my car and key at his house. I helped him and his (now) wife pack their belongings (5 small luggages seemed excessive, but didn't think twice) and gave him a quick rundown of the electronic gadgets in the car. He tossed me his Volvo keys, at which point I urged him to call me if he needed anything else. I gave them the phone number to one of my good friends who runs a quaint cafè not too far from their hotel and told them to put anything they wanted on my tab. We both went on our ways. The next day, I saw his FB picture posts of Santa Barbara, the scenery, the beaches... I stumbled on his wife's page and noticed a photo of him driving my car, window open, and a LIT CIGARETTE in his hand I am a light smoker, but I have NEVER smoked in my car, anyone else's cars, or casinos for that matter. I was disturbed to say the least, but decided not to let my emotions get in the way of everything. I wasn't going to be a killjoy and call him out during his honeymoon I figured I'd just vacuum the car when he gave it back, no problem. Finally the 3rd day came. I took the day off to wash his C30, polish it, vacuum, and tidy it up as another gesture of kindness. After waiting around my house all day, Kian calls around 10PM , sounding a bit perturbed and rushed. They were running late, but the nav found a good detour to shorten the trip. I told him I was gonna hit the hay, and I was gonna leave his car keys with the guard at the gate out the front of my small complex. I told him to park my car on the driveway and put my keys in my door's mail slot. I faintly hear the rumble of my exhaust around 1:35 AM, but was far too tired to get up to invite them in for some tea and pastries. Shortly after I get a text giving me his utmost gratitude for my help on their trip.

The next morning, I wake up for work, quick shower, grab my key fob and sprint outside because I was already 15 min behind schedule. The car was pretty filthy, but nothing absurd. Wheels were caked with brake dust, splattered bugs on the bumper, headlights, and windshield. Wiper fluid streaks on the roof. I shrugged it off because I was already so damn late. I step inside, and first thing I notice: it reeks! Smelled like a Vegas slot machine at 2 AM. Again, I brush it off because I knew full well he smoked in the car. The carpets have mud, leaves, and sand. I turn around and look at the back, the back seats are dusty, and the once mint conditioned carpets (no one really rides in the back) also had sand and grime. I sit there for a moment, and decide it could be worse. I start the engine, and as I click my seatbelt, I notice a 3 fun size Snickers candy wrappers on the side of the seat and an empty pack of Camels. I open the center console and find a melted (but unopened) Kit Kat bar and 2 drive thru receipts from McDonald's along with an unused straw (he told me he would never eat in my car). I was nearly seething inside because I knew there was probably more hidden treasures i.e. garbage I have yet to find. I pull out of my driveway, low fuel warning. Great, gotta fill up. I glance at my gauges, and notice the car has racked up more than 2000 miles on it. WTF??? I pull to the gas station, and fill up. My trip computer says the car averaged about 9.2 mpg, wow. I notice in the glove box a receipt for a Mobil gas transaction. The receipt said $3.92/gal. Immediately I thought, "that better not freaking be 87 octane" Icing on the cake: both passenger side wheels have curb rash, both rear tires are scabbed up and nearly bald. Front bumper scraped pretty decently. Oh joy.

Dilemma:
I called him that night I got back from work regarding the damages on the car in a calm fashion (still have not brought up the mileage or cigarettes, not sure how I should go about bringing it up) He and his wife seemed super apologetic and vowed to cover other damages I find, god forbid I find more. I took my car to get a quote on a wheel repair last week, but he has been consistently dodging my calls. I sent multiple texts asking if he wanted to grab lunch. Nada. My gf tells me I'm the imbecile for trusting my friend with my pride and joy. My head tells me "it's just a lease" but my coworkers tells me "he just forcefully bumf*cked your ride and returned you a used condom"
Really at a loss right now. Just finished clearing out the residual gunk in the car, but not sure if I can clear my conscience with Kian. I honestly feel f*cked over, but I am not confrontational. If you survived my melodramatic rant, I applaud you. Please shed some insight on what angle I should take on approaching this. I have never felt this disrespected from someone I considered a brother. Anger does not accurately describe how I feel, not really sure....

TL;DR--Long lost college friend gets engaged, I offer my M5 as their road trip car, get it back looking and smelling like a cracked out hooker. How mad should I be?

Yes I would be pissed...

[dtwyim]

My dad once told me there are three things you do not lend to your friend:
Wife
Car
Camera

To OP
Just look at this as a lesson to yourself how 'good' your 'friend' is to you. Thank god the car is leased since you damn well know those are 2,000 hard miles.

[John 070]

Originally Posted by dtwyim

My dad once told me there are three things you do not lend to your friend:
Wife
Car
Camera

To OP
Just look at this as a lesson to yourself how 'good' your 'friend' is to you. Thank god the car is leased since you damn well know those are 2,000 hard miles.

In my lifetime I find people to be loosey goosey with cars, ignoring the liability component of it. Especially with loaners/rentals.

With a rental, the only person who can drive it is your spouse, without being listed as an add'l driver. If you have a corporate rental that's different. But I've seen people give the keys to a rental to someone else like it ain't no thang, because it's not theirs. Again, I suspect the op did what he did because it's a lease, and would not have done the same if he owned.

[Ben2k9]

First off, I'd write the guy off as a friend forever. Clearly a complete loser.

Second, file a small claims lawsuit against the damages if he doesn't pay up asap.

The bottom line is the guy damaged your property, why should you have to pay for it?

[Maestro]

Originally Posted by kevinbahnz

A general contractor said something similar to me. He's gonna pay. Not today, not tomorrow , but one day.

Yeah we all hope for that one day, but if you ever dealt with these type of people the one day never comes. Also when you think you got them back, they actually got you back again. These kinds of people do not care.

BTW my Brother-in-law is a Doctor, and has the best bed side manor I seen of any Dr, and really cares about his patients, but, but he does shit like i said and care less what you think.

[P1]

I'm slammed at work, but I really enjoyed reading the story. NICE! I would definitely write this one off as a "lesson learned". He's already written off as a friend for disrespecting your property like that. It was nice of you to offer him the car, but in retrospect, it was very stupid. You had not seen this guy in a decade. He's NOT the same person he used to be. Sure, it's just a lease, but it should not matter. Can you put a dollar amount on the damage caused? If so, send him the bill for the repairs. If he refuses to pay, it'll have to come out of your own pocket. Not much else you can do.

[P1]

Originally Posted by kevinbahnz

A general contractor said something similar to me. He's gonna pay. Not today, not tomorrow , but one day.

I learned my lessons with general contractors. I got fucked over once, the asshole took off with my money and left me high and dry.

[John 070]

Originally Posted by Ben2k9

First off, I'd write the guy off as a friend forever. Clearly a complete loser.

Second, file a small claims lawsuit against the damages if he doesn't pay up asap.

The bottom line is the guy damaged your property, why should you have to pay for it?

It's not the OP's property, it was a lease. Yes, the friend was a rude walker. But he did not damage the OP's property.

[DSB335d]

Originally Posted by John 070

It's not the OP's property, it was a lease. Yes, the friend was a rude walker. But he did not damage the OP's property.

Just because the OP doesn't outright own the car doesn't make him any less responsible for damages done to it while in his possession...
The d-bag he lent the car to curb-rashed 2 wheels which is around $500 to fix.