Funny story I thought I would share with the OT crew...

NYCGarbagePrince · 06-14-2010, 12:52 PM

Alright this is a bit degrading but funny nonetheless..

So, I recently broke up with my girlfriend of 3 and a half years. The last few weeks of our relationship I completely checked out. We still slept in the same bed and went to dinner and did all the things we always did but I was just not there. So... I stopped maintaining my man bush. It got pretty out of control. My trimmer had broke a month or so earlier and I was in no hurry to get a new one.

For the first few weeks of being single I wasn't too interested in meeting people and I just focused on work and getting my head together. So I kept putting it off and putting it off. Randomly a friend invites me to a BBQ and without my knowledge is trying to set me up with this girl he is friends with. Turns out she is real sexy and one thing leads to another and we hit it off.

So now here I am fucking this girl with an enormous man bush, completely embarrassed but she doesn't seem to mind. She heads back to Boston the next day and says she will be back in a week. So my plan was to take care of this A.S.A.P. Which I didn't.

Fast forward to this friday. She is on her way back to NYC and thankfully taking the train so I have some extra time. I am at my parents house since I was having dinner with the family. I still have some stuff there and I remember I have my trimmer that I used to use a couple years ago. So i go to take care of business and fire the trimmer up. It runs like a champ! Without thinking twice I start attacking the task at hand. (A machete would have been more appropriate!) So I am so focused on what I am doing I fail to notice the trimmer is beginning to show signs of low battery. Being somewhat OCD, I am focusing on one side and getting that side perfect before I tackle the other. Just as I am finishing up the right side, the trimmer goes dead!

.......No problem... I will just grab the charger and plug it in and finish it up with the trimmer plugged in....... Oh no... Where is the charger!?!? The cable is gone! I mean it does not exist. So, now here I am, with a jekyl and hide situation going on and absolutely no recourse. She is arriving in 2 hours and I am a solid 45 minutes from my APT in the city. I have dinner with my family in about 15 minutes.

Hop in the shower, clean up the hair near the toilet and get ready to eat dinner with the family. Now I am sitting at the dinner table feeling uncomfortable as ALL HELL with one side itching and the other side bulging. It felt awful. I rush through dinner to the point where my family was noticing how rushed my actions were. I brushed their observations off and ran to my car hopped in and made my way to my apt.

Thankfully, I live right above a Duane Reade. So, I made it there with about 15 minutes to spare and find a nice new Wahl trimmer to finish the job. I know most of you expected a horrible ending to this story. Some might feel short changed and may believe I would have been better off lying about finishing the job. Instead, telling you all that I showed off my new creation to this chick instead of finishing what needed to be done. But that is not the case.

However, heed my warning. Next time you go to shave your balls in unfamiliar territory, make sure your tools are in order.

BallsBrawn · 06-14-2010, 12:56 PM

Kroy · 06-14-2010, 01:03 PM

DougLikesBMW · 06-14-2010, 01:09 PM

Did she say anything next time y'all got together and saw you sans manbush?

Lol'd hard at perfecting one side...bahahaha.

Also, pics of chick and ex-gf?

NYCGarbagePrince · 06-14-2010, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DougLikesBMW

Did she say anything next time y'all got together and saw you sans manbush?

Lol'd hard at perfecting one side...bahahaha.

Also, pics of chick and ex-gf?

I have seen what happens to posted pics......Not gonna happen. And no comment about the missing fro. However, I woke up to some more dome 3 hours after we passed out, so I am assuming it was much appreciated.

DougLikesBMW · 06-14-2010, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NYCGarbagePrince

I have seen what happens to posted pics......Not gonna happen. And no comment about the missing fro. However, I woke up to some more dome 3 hours after we passed out, so I am assuming it was much appreciated.

Well it was worth a try...Niiice.

Couch · 06-14-2010, 01:44 PM

Why in the world did you stop in the first place?

That shit's annoying to myself, let alone a female. lol. Keep your bush in check!

Verbiage · 06-14-2010, 01:50 PM

Seems like you had a crisis. Glad everything worked out. I thought it would have been funnier, though

MCMLXXXIX · 06-14-2010, 01:51 PM

ybbiz34 · 06-14-2010, 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NYCGarbagePrince

However, heed my warning. Next time you go to shave your balls in unfamiliar territory, make sure your tools are in order.

Well said.

Alexander · 06-14-2010, 02:10 PM

I thought that you were going to cut yourself. Oh well.

Verbiage · 06-14-2010, 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aonarch

I thought that you were going to cut yourself. Oh well.

Disappointed?

NYCGarbagePrince · 06-14-2010, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bavarian III

Disappointed?

My frank and beans are certainly not disappointed in the lack of blood.

Yearofthe1 · 06-14-2010, 03:17 PM

Thanks for the story.

Now I don't feel like that much of a freak that I'm getting my man-bush lasered this week. Not the whole thing, just the strategic areas.

My woman's had her underarms and legs done, and now I'm jealous. It's my turn dammit!

Verbiage · 06-14-2010, 03:29 PM

^ Lasered, though? LOL!

dillon733 · 06-14-2010, 03:31 PM

lmao epic story

VinnieAces · 06-14-2010, 07:25 PM

BOOOOOSH!

Yearofthe1 · 06-14-2010, 08:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bavarian III

^ Lasered, though? LOL!

Hey, what can I say? I'm sick of shaving and all the annoyances that come with it: nicks, razor burn, and the worst one - the sporadic in-grown hair.

Verbiage · 06-14-2010, 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yearofthe1

Hey, what can I say? I'm sick of shaving and all the annoyances that come with it: nicks, razor burn, and the worst one - the sporadic in-grown hair.

NOOOOOOOO!!!

radix · 06-14-2010, 09:03 PM

lol, i'll keep that in mind

e92m3ftw · 06-14-2010, 09:08 PM

Wow you had me going for a second, I was waiting for the part when she saw that. I am sure her reaction would have been like WTF is this shit. But anyway you did the mission impossible. I just hope everyone here learned a valuable lesson on how to your save your ass at the last minute

.

Verbiage · 06-14-2010, 09:38 PM

I think the OP should have made up a different ending.

06-14-2010, 12:52 PM	#1
NYCGarbagePrince Major 247 Rep 1,435 Posts Drives: X6 50i Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: NYC iTrader: (0)	Funny story I thought I would share with the OT crew... Alright this is a bit degrading but funny nonetheless.. So, I recently broke up with my girlfriend of 3 and a half years. The last few weeks of our relationship I completely checked out. We still slept in the same bed and went to dinner and did all the things we always did but I was just not there. So... I stopped maintaining my man bush. It got pretty out of control. My trimmer had broke a month or so earlier and I was in no hurry to get a new one. For the first few weeks of being single I wasn't too interested in meeting people and I just focused on work and getting my head together. So I kept putting it off and putting it off. Randomly a friend invites me to a BBQ and without my knowledge is trying to set me up with this girl he is friends with. Turns out she is real sexy and one thing leads to another and we hit it off. So now here I am fucking this girl with an enormous man bush, completely embarrassed but she doesn't seem to mind. She heads back to Boston the next day and says she will be back in a week. So my plan was to take care of this A.S.A.P. Which I didn't. Fast forward to this friday. She is on her way back to NYC and thankfully taking the train so I have some extra time. I am at my parents house since I was having dinner with the family. I still have some stuff there and I remember I have my trimmer that I used to use a couple years ago. So i go to take care of business and fire the trimmer up. It runs like a champ! Without thinking twice I start attacking the task at hand. (A machete would have been more appropriate!) So I am so focused on what I am doing I fail to notice the trimmer is beginning to show signs of low battery. Being somewhat OCD, I am focusing on one side and getting that side perfect before I tackle the other. Just as I am finishing up the right side, the trimmer goes dead! .......No problem... I will just grab the charger and plug it in and finish it up with the trimmer plugged in....... Oh no... Where is the charger!?!? The cable is gone! I mean it does not exist. So, now here I am, with a jekyl and hide situation going on and absolutely no recourse. She is arriving in 2 hours and I am a solid 45 minutes from my APT in the city. I have dinner with my family in about 15 minutes. Hop in the shower, clean up the hair near the toilet and get ready to eat dinner with the family. Now I am sitting at the dinner table feeling uncomfortable as ALL HELL with one side itching and the other side bulging. It felt awful. I rush through dinner to the point where my family was noticing how rushed my actions were. I brushed their observations off and ran to my car hopped in and made my way to my apt. Thankfully, I live right above a Duane Reade. So, I made it there with about 15 minutes to spare and find a nice new Wahl trimmer to finish the job. I know most of you expected a horrible ending to this story. Some might feel short changed and may believe I would have been better off lying about finishing the job. Instead, telling you all that I showed off my new creation to this chick instead of finishing what needed to be done. But that is not the case. However, heed my warning. Next time you go to shave your balls in unfamiliar territory, make sure your tools are in order.
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06-14-2010, 12:56 PM	#2
BallsBrawn Banned 10 Rep 48 Posts Drives: Audi S5, e90 328i Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: South FL iTrader: (0)
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06-14-2010, 01:03 PM	#3
Kroy Brigadier General 173 Rep 3,032 Posts Drives: E90 Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Los Angeles, CA iTrader: (1)
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06-14-2010, 01:09 PM	#4
DougLikesBMW Fapmin 402 Rep 2,660 Posts Drives: '03 E46 330Ci Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Plano, Texas iTrader: (0)	Did she say anything next time y'all got together and saw you sans manbush? Lol'd hard at perfecting one side...bahahaha. Also, pics of chick and ex-gf?
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06-14-2010, 01:44 PM	#7
Couch Colonel 142 Rep 2,900 Posts Drives: E92 335i Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Houston iTrader: (0) Garage List 2007 E92 335i [0.00]	Why in the world did you stop in the first place? That shit's annoying to myself, let alone a female. lol. Keep your bush in check!
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06-14-2010, 01:50 PM	#8
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3583 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	Seems like you had a crisis. Glad everything worked out. I thought it would have been funnier, though __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
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06-14-2010, 01:51 PM	#9
MCMLXXXIX wat 238 Rep 3,406 Posts Drives: a gr3at whit3 5hark Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Oct 2008 iTrader: (0)	__________________ 2012 Toyota Highlander SE - PAST - 2008 e92 335i, 2006 e90 325i
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06-14-2010, 02:10 PM	#11
Alexander Mad tyte EuR0 style boooi <--- Joke 212 Rep 2,472 Posts Drives: E30, E85, MKVI Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Deal's Gap iTrader: (0)	I thought that you were going to cut yourself. Oh well.
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06-14-2010, 03:17 PM	#14
Yearofthe1 An ex-addict :-( 33 Rep 691 Posts Drives: VFR1200F Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: N. Va. iTrader: (1)	Thanks for the story. Now I don't feel like that much of a freak that I'm getting my man-bush lasered this week. Not the whole thing, just the strategic areas. My woman's had her underarms and legs done, and now I'm jealous. It's my turn dammit! __________________ 135i Montego Blue, Grey Boston Leather, MT, Sport Package, Premium Package, Navi, Premium Sound, Heated Seats, iPod. [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] We search for certainty and call what we find destiny. Everything is possible, yet only one thing happens. -Michael and Ellen Kaplan
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06-14-2010, 03:29 PM	#15
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3583 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	^ Lasered, though? LOL! __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
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06-14-2010, 03:31 PM	#16
dillon733 Major 96 Rep 1,196 Posts Drives: Jet Black e92 M3 Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: new york iTrader: (3)	lmao epic story
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06-14-2010, 07:25 PM	#17
VinnieAces Lieutenant Colonel 92 Rep 1,603 Posts Drives: Imola Red Z4MC Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Ontario, Can iTrader: (2) Garage List 2006 Z4 M Coupe [8.00]	BOOOOOSH! __________________ ///M - Some Mods 'N Stuff
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06-14-2010, 09:03 PM	#20
radix you know he kills little girls like you 388 Rep 892 Posts Drives: - Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: - iTrader: (0)	lol, i'll keep that in mind
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06-14-2010, 09:08 PM	#21
e92m3ftw Registered 8 Rep 4 Posts Drives: e92m3 Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: VA iTrader: (0)	Wow you had me going for a second, I was waiting for the part when she saw that. I am sure her reaction would have been like WTF is this shit. But anyway you did the mission impossible. I just hope everyone here learned a valuable lesson on how to your save your ass at the last minute .
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06-14-2010, 09:38 PM	#22
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3583 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	I think the OP should have made up a different ending. __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
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