E90Post
 


Extreme Powerhouse
 
BMW 3-Series (E90 E92) Forum > BIMMERPOST Universal Forums > Off-Topic Discussions Board > Confused on my sexuality



Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      06-03-2014, 03:51 PM   #1
prowheelie92
Private First Class
prowheelie92's Avatar
10
Rep
132
Posts

Drives: bmw 335i
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: new jersey

iTrader: (0)

Confused on my sexuality

After installing the infamous performance exhaust with carbon fiber cyba tips on my 335i I became peculiarly addicted to my vehicle. Every morning I would wake up and march gaily(happily) down the stairs, go outside, turn on my car, and stare at my exhaust in awe. A few mornings go by repeating the same process and I found my addiction growing stronger and stronger. It got so extreme that one morning I found myself fondling with my genitalia. Now of course I found this moment utterly disturbing at first so I quickly elevated my hand back into my pockets. It is as if my subconscious mind started to "feel some type of way" towards my car. Obviously this is beyond the social norm and I would not dare be caught doing something so absurd. So now I only do this morning process during the night time, where I can be obscure all by myself.

If there is anyone out there, and I mean anyone, with similar experiences please PM me and we can talk. Thanks for reading.

Last edited by prowheelie92; 06-03-2014 at 04:22 PM..
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 03:53 PM   #2
Crimson92
Smiling Politely
Crimson92's Avatar
United_States
1380
Rep
29,118
Posts

Drives: Like a boss
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Whales Vagina

iTrader: (3)

__________________
Quote:
Some people are like slinkies...not really good for much but you can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs"
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 03:56 PM   #3
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11820
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Well, this will be a fun thread.

I hope you all the best, and I sure will know if you act on this, you will have more fulfilling life than most of the folks here.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 03:57 PM   #4
2011CrazE89
Moved on
2011CrazE89's Avatar
United_States
123
Rep
166
Posts

Drives: 2011 Z430i & 2015 MB C300
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: South Florida

iTrader: (0)

Mmmkay
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:01 PM   #5
Crimson92
Smiling Politely
Crimson92's Avatar
United_States
1380
Rep
29,118
Posts

Drives: Like a boss
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Whales Vagina

iTrader: (3)

You two should hang out.

__________________
Quote:
Some people are like slinkies...not really good for much but you can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs"
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:02 PM   #6
PINeely
Lieutenant Colonel
PINeely's Avatar
United_States
1086
Rep
1,912
Posts

Drives: 2013 535i, 2015 Tundra 1794
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Jackson, MS

iTrader: (2)

It make me feel some type of way
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:04 PM   #7
954Stealth
Brigadier General
954Stealth's Avatar
United_States
1543
Rep
4,512
Posts

Drives: A Car
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Bacon Raton, FL

iTrader: (1)

Stay away from the tailpipes
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:05 PM   #8
2011CrazE89
Moved on
2011CrazE89's Avatar
United_States
123
Rep
166
Posts

Drives: 2011 Z430i & 2015 MB C300
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: South Florida

iTrader: (0)

Did you "pop the hood" yet?
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:07 PM   #9
prowheelie92
Private First Class
prowheelie92's Avatar
10
Rep
132
Posts

Drives: bmw 335i
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: new jersey

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2011CrazE89 View Post
Did you "pop the hood" yet?
You bet I did. I've anal-lyzed every hole in this vehicle.
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:07 PM   #10
954Stealth
Brigadier General
954Stealth's Avatar
United_States
1543
Rep
4,512
Posts

Drives: A Car
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Bacon Raton, FL

iTrader: (1)

Have you gotten to 4th gear yet
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:08 PM   #11
FC4
Brigadier General
2644
Rep
3,393
Posts

Drives: Yes
Join Date: May 2014
Location: US

iTrader: (0)

Trying too hard to be funny.
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:10 PM   #12
PINeely
Lieutenant Colonel
PINeely's Avatar
United_States
1086
Rep
1,912
Posts

Drives: 2013 535i, 2015 Tundra 1794
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Jackson, MS

iTrader: (2)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 954Stealth View Post
Have you gotten to 4th gear yet
Fucking lost it
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:15 PM   #13
prowheelie92
Private First Class
prowheelie92's Avatar
10
Rep
132
Posts

Drives: bmw 335i
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: new jersey

iTrader: (0)

IDam I just got trolled hard...lesson learned..never leave your account logged in
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:29 PM   #14
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11820
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by prowheelie92 View Post
IDam I just got trolled hard...lesson learned..never leave your account logged in
LOL I learned this a long time ago with IRC, Epic feeling, isn't it.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 04:35 PM   #15
Rotorocious
Lieutenant Colonel
Rotorocious's Avatar
103
Rep
1,520
Posts

Drives: 335xi
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Colorado

iTrader: (3)

335 exhaust will never sound thaaaaaat good.
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 05:17 PM   #16
ddk632
Chief Senior Executive Managing VP of Orange Sales
ddk632's Avatar
United_States
583
Rep
2,581
Posts

Drives: 17 BMW F87 M2 6MT MG HBDGR !
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Aventura, FL

iTrader: (2)

Quote:
Originally Posted by prowheelie92 View Post
IDam I just got trolled hard...lesson learned..never leave your account logged in
Hey man, there's someone with access to your account trying to deprive you of your true feelings for your car by saying you got trolled. Don't let them get you. Follow your d.. , uh, heart!

I still have fond memories of my one time lawnmower, Grassy Bitch. She was a great ride.
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 06:27 PM   #17
ShopVac
Not willing to take advice
ShopVac's Avatar
No_Country
4020
Rep
1,519
Posts

Drives: F82 M4 - 6MT
Join Date: May 2010
Location: PA

iTrader: (1)

Garage List
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wittstock View Post
I have always wondered who the guy in this video was. We found him, and his name is OP.

Note how he refers to the car as a "him". Gay car love

Okay...this is disturbing in so many ways.
__________________
Proud owner of 4 Turbos and 1 Supercharger
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 08:30 PM   #18
prowheelie92
Private First Class
prowheelie92's Avatar
10
Rep
132
Posts

Drives: bmw 335i
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: new jersey

iTrader: (0)

hahaha taking a beating over here. i really hope my subconcious mind isnt attracted to my car o_O
Appreciate 0
      06-03-2014, 11:42 PM   #19
NEFARIOUS
Captain
NEFARIOUS's Avatar
United_States
431
Rep
686
Posts

Drives: 06 330xi (TRADED IN)
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Baconville, BN

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Please tell me that this is a joke/troll... I've been proud of my car and stared at her even despite the fact that she's bone stock, but not to this level...
Attached Images
 
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by jtodd_fl View Post
NEFARIOUS would totally rock the dreads if he could.
::THE MACHETE::
Appreciate 0
      06-04-2014, 07:32 AM   #20
Billup
Banned
Burkina Faso
472
Rep
928
Posts

Drives: Your mum crazy.
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Baconopolos Island

iTrader: (0)

All of that happened from a 335?


Could have at least chosen something worth while to get all excited over.
Appreciate 0
      06-04-2014, 10:44 AM   #21
Malibu1
First Lieutenant
36
Rep
313
Posts

Drives: Charger HC, Backdraft Cobra
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Washington State

iTrader: (2)

You have a 335i. It always starts this way. You believe it is love but it is infact lust that you are feeling right now. Give it a couple weeks then her true identity will start to show through. First she will start to misfire. You will assume that it was just you and that changing a coil or a plug will make her feel fine. And it will. But then right when you feel back in love again, more misfires will happen. But this time you will find out its also injectors. You shell out some cash and hand over the credit card. This is when she will show her true self. Multiple misfires, fuel pumps, water pumps, TPMS warnings. It will never end. But now you are in love. Love is blind. Good luck to us all.
__________________
Currently own: 1965 Backdraft Cobra Replica, 2013 SVT Raptor, 2020 Charger Hellcat, 1967 Olds
Appreciate 0
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:38 PM.




e90post
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST