Thanks man
I really don't think that she is having an affair.
She also doesn't have guts to get physical with me.
Our house is almost paid off. It is going to be 50/50 and there is nothing I can do about it.
Her car (2009 Accord) is on her name and paid off.
My cars (2008 335i e93 and 2006 Explorer) are paid off.
No other depth.
I have my checking account, she has hers. Our pay checks go to our own accounts.
Other than that, her assets (cache + 401K) are more than my assets (cache + 401K) that are not hidden.
I am not sure making her life miserable would help me at all since I probably paying for my lawyer and her lawyer (she is legally entitled to demand that I would pay for her lawyer since she can not afford)
At this point my only hope is she would accept my offer without talking to a lawyer : 2000K a month forever, or $100,000-150,000 one time cache payment). But I still have to give her child support. There is no way to get around it. If she turns down my offer, I can only hope that she remarries soon after the divorce.