LOL I so get you OP.
I moved to Seattle 6 months ago, and I can indeed assure you, no life is the way to go. Here is the list of things I do to entertain myself:
1. Coffee. It's hard enough to stay awake anyway, so this helps.
2. Coffee. It's the only safe enough topic to talk about with the folks around here.
3. Coffee. I hit on my extremely gay Starbucks bloke every morning, and I do it with passion. The only problem is that even if I keep saying the right things like "Come on, just say yes, marry me, you can keep the boyfriend even, I can just watch" he really is not into females. He said I've turned into a hetero male. That was not a compliment.
Well he quit a few days ago, so now instead of hitting on him, I keep his picture in my phone, just to remind myself not to go after the other extremely gay employe there. I can't risk living without coffee, and he doesn't have TJ's flair.
4. I have nothing more to add.